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    Football Related Jokes

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    Post by crump Tue Jan 04, 2011 10:44 pm

    No arguments, pictures blah blah. Just jokes.

    I'll start.

    I have the same amount of Premier League Winner Medals as Steven Gerrard.
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:06 pm

    atastycrumpet wrote:No arguments, pictures blah blah. Just jokes.

    I'll start.

    I have the same amount of Premier League Winner Medals as Steven Gerrard.

    I have the same amount of European cup or Champion's League winners medal as Arsenal Football club Football Related Jokes 209254

    How many treble's have Arsenal won study

    Arsenal have never been the Greatest Club team in the World Football Related Jokes 318833


    Last edited by Liverpool fc 4 ever on Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:10 pm; edited 1 time in total
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:08 pm

    Not really jokes are they, just stating a fact. Neutral
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    Post by crump Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:09 pm

    OK then, another football joke is Gary Neville.
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:11 pm

    kyro7 wrote:Not really jokes are they, just stating a fact. Neutral

    I agree but he started it Football Related Jokes 932713
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:13 pm

    atastycrumpet wrote:OK then, another football joke is Gary Neville.
    Hmm, over his career he is no joke, he's been a brilliant player, as of now he's awful.. but he's been a great right back.
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    Post by crump Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:14 pm

    Shall we carry on with the jokes now?
    Football Related Jokes 267199
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:17 pm

    Yeah maybe we should, just instead of making jokes you seem to be trying to have digs. Laughing
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    Post by Pippo Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:19 pm

    As a Sunderland fan, I was delighted that we signed Asamoah Gyan.

    As a racist however, i'm distraught.
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    Post by Barton Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:23 pm

    Lee Bowyer.
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    Post by Guest Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:25 pm

    atastycrumpet wrote:OK then, another football joke is Gary Neville.

    What with his

    8 League title's, 2 European cup's, 3 FA Cups, 2 League cups 1 Intercontinental cup 1 FIFA Club world cup and 3 Charity shields Football Related Jokes 207657

    I would actually say he is a Manchester.United and English football legend and im not his favourite fan but you cant argue with what he has won Football Related Jokes 950455 He is just a complete winner IMO
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:08 am

    Where does Heskey take his bird on a date?

    Out for Emile
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:18 am

    forestfcfan wrote:Where does Heskey take his bird on a date?

    Out for Emile
    rofl rofl
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    Post by Kaka11|LFC Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:34 am

    Took me a couple of seconds to get it, I had to say it in my head. Razz
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    Post by Trig Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:37 am

    why do pigeons in liverpool fly upside down?








    because there is nothing worth shitting on
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    Post by Barton Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:42 am

    Q: If you see a Liverpool or Everton Fan on a bike, why should you never swerve to hit him?

    A: It might be your bike... Neutral
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:45 am

    What is the center back of QPR's favourite type of clothing?

    One size Fitz Hall


    What's a fossil's favourite football team?

    S'underland


    Why do the Arsenal team have clean bums?

    Because of Arshavin.
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:07 am

    Girlfriend turned the channel over just as Arsenals new striker was about to score.

    Looks like im gonna have to Chamakh ma bitch up
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:09 am

    I saw forestfcfan shagging a goalkeeper the other day.

    Always thought the goalie was Camp.
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    Post by Cornholio Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:10 am

    Man United have signed a new striker from Nigeria.

    On his first day of training, Fergie picked up the ball and said 'BALL'
    then pointed at the goal and said 'Goal. Then he demonstrated a kicking
    motion and said 'Kick' understand, 'Kick ball, goal, GOOOOOAAAALLL!'

    Eventually the young African plucks up courage to say "Excuse me Mr
    Ferguson but I speak very good English", to which Fergie replies ' Sit
    down son, I'm talking to Rooney.'
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:12 am

    ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ wrote:Man United have signed a new striker from Nigeria.

    On his first day of training, Fergie picked up the ball and said 'BALL'
    then pointed at the goal and said 'Goal. Then he demonstrated a kicking
    motion and said 'Kick' understand, 'Kick ball, goal, GOOOOOAAAALLL!'

    Eventually the young African plucks up courage to say "Excuse me Mr
    Ferguson but I speak very good English", to which Fergie replies ' Sit
    down son, I'm talking to Rooney.'

    I've heard that one but still Football Related Jokes 70955 Football Related Jokes 70955 Football Related Jokes 70955
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:14 am

    Ashley Cole knocked on my door the other night.

    The girlfriend asked who it was, to which I replied, Baby it's Cole outside...
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:15 am

    Where does Steven live?

    Bywater.
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:25 am

    South Africans have invented a new sex toy

    It's called the Vuvugina
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:27 am

    Sven was discussing his tactics to the team and suddenly Darius Vassel pipes up and says, "Leicester time talking Sven, we have a match to win".
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:30 am

    Let's have a pun-off


    No pun intended
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:30 am

    forestfcfan wrote:Let's have a pun-off


    No pun intended

    You're on. You start!
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    Post by Cornholio Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:33 am

    Liverpool are to play Forrest in the FA cup. On the day of the game the whole squad are hanging from a pretty heavy night out, except for Torres who didn't drink.

    The squad don't want to play so Torres says, "I will play this one on my own". The lads are delighted they don't have to play and go to the pub for a cure.

    They're checking the score on teletext, and after 10 minutes Torres has scored. The lads are delighted. As it gets to the end teletext refreshes to say Forrest have equalized in the 90th minute.

    The lads don't mind as they can handle the replay. They go back to Anfield to see Nando. He's sitting in the dressing room with his head in his hands, and as the lads walk in he says, "Sorry boys, I let you all down".

    They console him by saying, "What are you talking about? You took on 11 players and managed to get a draw, so we didn't have to play with hang overs."

    Torres replies, "No you don't understand, I got sent off after 60 minutes."
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    Post by Guest Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:35 am

    You can't always place the blame on Arsenals left back, it's becoming a Clichy now
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    Post by Pippo Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:36 am

    forestfcfan wrote:You can't always place the blame on Arsenals left back, it's becoming a Clichy now

    What do you call a liar at Liverpool?

    Elejro.

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