Your Perfect Goal

"For those just tuning in it's Leeds United nil, Manchester United nil. As it stands Manchester United are safe from relegation and Leeds United are going back down to the Championship after spending just the one season back in the top flight. Leeds must score a goal to stay up and send their rivals down although they only have precious few seconds to do so. Lonergan takes the goal kick as quick as he can, Ferdinand heads it back into the Leeds half, Howson decides to volley it from his own half and my word it's in! De Gea is left bewildered as local lad Jonny Howson catches him completely by surprise! Elland Road has erupted in celebration. Manchester United seemed to be staying up by the skin of their teeth at the expense of Leeds United but Jonny Howson was having none of that! Manchester United have been dire ever since Ferguson retired at the end of last season and now realisation has set in that they will be playing in the second division of English football for the first time in what seems like forever. The fans get back to their seats, the players get back to their positions and the referee blows his whistle for Manchester United to kick off and then blows it again to end the season. Howson and Grayson chants fill the ground followed by the Leeds players singing Marching On Together on this historic day."

Fucking hell, these play-by-play commentary things are cheesy as fuck.

Cam wrote:90th minute, I'm standing about 30 yards out picking my nose, and then theres a lovely cushioned header by Neil Mellor and i run on to it and unleash a wicked ass shot until the bottom corner.

*Mellor, lovely cushioned header for CAMMMMEERRRRONNNN, OHHHHHH YA BEAUTYY WHAT A HIT SON, WHAT A HIT*

ridiculous how many times in Gerrards career the ball fell right too him after bouncing around for a while. It was almost like it was attracted to his foot at times.

coolhead33 wrote:"For those just tuning in it's Leeds United nil, Manchester United nil. As it stands Manchester United are safe from relegation and Leeds United are going back down to the Championship after spending just the one season back in the top flight. Leeds must score a goal to stay up and send their rivals down although they only have precious few seconds to do so. Lonergan takes the goal kick as quick as he can, Ferdinand heads it back into the Leeds half, Howson decides to volley it from his own half and my word it's in! De Gea is left bewildered as local lad Jonny Howson catches him completely by surprise! Elland Road has erupted in celebration. Manchester United seemed to be staying up by the skin of their teeth at the expense of Leeds United but Jonny Howson was having none of that! Manchester United have been dire ever since Ferguson retired at the end of last season and now realisation has set in that they will be playing in the second division of English football for the first time in what seems like forever. The fans get back to their seats, the players get back to their positions and the referee blows his whistle for Manchester United to kick off and then blows it again to end the season. Howson and Grayson chants fill the ground followed by the Leeds players singing Marching On Together on this historic day."

This sounds something like when Deano scored for us to beat Cardiff ultimately sending Leeds down.

fluffy_kittens wrote:

Cam wrote:90th minute, I'm standing about 30 yards out picking my nose, and then theres a lovely cushioned header by Neil Mellor and i run on to it and unleash a wicked ass shot until the bottom corner.

*Mellor, lovely cushioned header for CAMMMMEERRRRONNNN, OHHHHHH YA BEAUTYY WHAT A HIT SON, WHAT A HIT*

ridiculous how many times in Gerrards career the ball fell right too him after bouncing around for a while. It was almost like it was attracted to his foot at times.

Right place at the right time, it's a gift.

Radford11 wrote:"Radford...now Tudor's gone down for Newcastle...Radford
again...OH, WHAT A GOAL!!! What a goal! Radford the scorer! Ronnie
Radford! And the crowd...the crowd are invading the pitch! No goalkeeper
in the world would have stopped that!"

A cow scores an overhead winner

Jay wrote:

fluffy_kittens wrote:

Cam wrote:90th minute, I'm standing about 30 yards out picking my nose, and then theres a lovely cushioned header by Neil Mellor and i run on to it and unleash a wicked ass shot until the bottom corner.

*Mellor, lovely cushioned header for CAMMMMEERRRRONNNN, OHHHHHH YA BEAUTYY WHAT A HIT SON, WHAT A HIT*

ridiculous how many times in Gerrards career the ball fell right too him after bouncing around for a while. It was almost like it was attracted to his foot at times.

Right place at the right time, it's a gift.

It is it's like magic. Always admired Gerrard regardless, you just have to hand it to some players regardless of what club they play for or whatever else.

Reina to Agger, Agger to Enrique, Enrique to Lucas, Lucas to Poulsen, Poulsen to Carragher, HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOF

Spoiler:

Carroll misses ball. Suarez to Downing. Downing cross, Carroll thorws himself into it. Goal.

At the Britannia.

From a throw in, Sagna gently give it to Arshavin from on the half way line, Arshavin spots many option, yet decides to dribble, past one, past two, he's running at Shawcross now, Ryan tries to back away but is forced to commit to a challenge, Arshavin nutmegs him and runs at the Begovic, Begovic rushes off his line prematurely, Arshavin deftly lobs it over him, he runs into the Stoke crowd with his finger over his lip.

The crowd goes silent.

Noticing this Arshavin lifts his shirt up to see the following written on his undershirt.

"Where's your famous atmosphere?"

I would jizz spontaneously if that happened.

Rei Andros wrote:

There, Ronaldo's run meets the ball's path, and the striker does two stepovers before rounding the goalkeeper and tapping the ball into the back of the net.


Yeah, that's mine. What's yours?

A goal can't be perfect without Ronaldo's stepovers and rounding the keeper.

Ronaldo

Gareth Bale runs by some of the best defenders in the world, our first year in the champions league, against the reigning champs. Bale just straight up runs past people and gently nudges the ball into the net with his left foot, so graceful. Whats this? He's doing the same exact thing again? Could it be? 3 times in one game!?!

perfect

It's really hard to describe a perfect goal. There are too many possibilities (some unrealistic).

0-0 with algeria, Howard with the long throw, over the half way line, Dempsey strides forward, Dempsey nears goal, has donovan and altidore in the middle, Dempsey fires! saved! Rebound! Donovan has scored! USA TAKES THE GROUP!

fluffy_kittens wrote:0-0 with algeria, Howard with the long throw, over the half way line, Dempsey strides forward, Dempsey nears goal, has donovan and altidore in the middle, Dempsey fires! saved! Rebound! Donovan has scored! USA TAKES THE GROUP!

Whoa, slow down there. Let's not be too unrealistic.

he Perfect Goal:

Carragher plays a brilliant pass into Baros in the box, Baros lays it off to Gerrard. It's GERRARD in front of goal, Gattuso pulls him down, PENALTY!!! The referee awards a penalty to Liverpool. Alonso steps up to the spot he shoots! and it's saved by DIDA! Alonso gets it on the rebound, GOAAAAAAAAAAAL!!!! Xabi ALonso, It's 3-3, 3 goals in six minutes from Liverpool, It's unbelievable, The crowd are going wild!

ahlycotc wrote:It's really hard to describe a perfect goal. There are too many possibilities (some unrealistic).

Gives you a lot of leeway to make crazy stuff up and be creative. Not like some people here posting goals they've already seen.

Rei Andros wrote:

ahlycotc wrote:It's really hard to describe a perfect goal. There are too many possibilities (some unrealistic).

Gives you a lot of leeway to make crazy stuff up and be creative. Not like some people here posting goals they've already seen.

OK, I'll take a crack at it....

2014 World Cup Final: Egypt v Algeria. It's the 93rd minute with the score at 1-1. Bob Bradley () brings on veteran Mohamed Aboutrika with 1 minute to go in his last game before retiring. Egypt have the ball in the back...you know what?...

If I were to pick a situation, it would be the 2003 UEFA Cup Final. Celtic are 3-2 down to Porto. Larsson is on a hat trick. Cross comes in, and Larsson seals his hat trick with a diving header. Celtic go on to win on penalties.

SBSP wrote:If I were to pick a situation, it would be the 2003 UEFA Cup Final. Celtic are 3-2 down to Porto. Larsson is on a hat trick. Cross comes in, and Larsson seals his hat trick with a diving header. Celtic go on to win on penalties.

You have to do it like a commentator..

Cam wrote:

SBSP wrote:If I were to pick a situation, it would be the 2003 UEFA Cup Final. Celtic are 3-2 down to Porto. Larsson is on a hat trick. Cross comes in, and Larsson seals his hat trick with a diving header. Celtic go on to win on penalties.

You have to do it like a commentator..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iYAmAnhEAg

Just replace Edmund with Thompson.

Kelvin Davis has a free kick about 20 yards from his goal.
He smashes the ball forward 80 yards towards the far post
Fonte outjumps the left back, and connects with the header that loops over the stranded keeper.

Fuck yea. Hoof ftw.

Class.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdy5fKdLvL8

Ben 10 wrote:Fucking hell, these play-by-play commentary things are cheesy as fuck.

You called.

Jeremy Menez dives at the edge of the box even though he was 5m offside already, BUT REF AWARDS THE PK

Totti places the ball down at the spot, exhales, but BORRIELLO shoves Totti off, claiming he deserves to take the PK

Borriello shoots straight at the keeper, who parries the ball out...

The ball takes deflections off 15 players like a pinball machine. Eventually it deflects off the shinguard of an opposition player, and rolls into the back of the net.

AS Roma parks the bus for the rest of the game, even though it's a friendly, and WINS 1-0 vs FC Carpenedolo

Howard catches a cross, throws it half field to Donovan.

Donovan sprints 30-40 yards down field, through ball to Altidore

Altidore crosses to Dempsey

Dempsey's shot -- SAVED








But wait! The keeper has not secured the ball

Donovan comes storming in like the 143rd at Normandy, DONOVAN SHOT. DONOVAN GOAL. SIDE FOOTED INTO THE BACK OF THE NET. OH SHIT SON.
























































Swag.

dena wrote:Howard catches a cross, throws it half field to Donovan.

Donovan sprints 30-40 yards down field, through ball to Altidore

Altidore crosses to Dempsey

Dempsey's shot -- SAVED








But wait! The keeper has not secured the ball

Donovan comes storming in like the 143rd at Normandy, DONOVAN SHOT. DONOVAN GOAL. SIDE FOOTED INTO THE BACK OF THE NET. OH SHIT SON.
























































Swag.

prettymuch the one I picked

It's the last minute of the FA Cup, Riise tries to chip the ball to Cisse, Gabbidon clears it and the ball falls to Gerrard HES HIT FROM 30 YARDS AND ITS INNNNNNNNN! OHHHHH WHAT A GOALLLLLL!